You really prefer to get a full night’s sleep, or else you might be cranky the next day. You slide back into your sleeping bag and don’t wake again until the morning.

You have a quick breakfast of some kind of fruit that doesn’t look super poisonous, and resume your search for civilization.

Arriving in village

Wait a second…this isn’t a tiki bar!

After a few hours of hiking, you come to an overlook with a sweeping view of the valley below. There, nestled along a riverbank, you spot a small village. You start running down the hill. You’re saved!

Fortunately, the tribe is in need of an ophthalmologist, and you are welcomed into their society. Over the years, you earn their respect and trust by fashioning eyeglasses out of coconuts and performing cataract surgery with a palm frond. You are even allowed to court and marry one of the chief’s daughters.

The years slip by.

One day, you are holding your great-grandson on your knee, telling him the story of how you were once almost the president of a great and faraway land—and you find you can’t recall the name of the country you almost ruled.

THE END

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