All at once it hits you. You’re totally unqualified for this job! What were you thinking? Just because a skilled con man can talk a hospital into letting him perform open-heart surgery doesn’t mean he should. And just because you’re persuasive enough to convince slightly less than half of American voters that you should be the most powerful human being alive doesn’t mean you should actually take them up on it.
Plus, even if you quit now, people will still have to call you “Mr. President” for the rest of your life. If you’re being honest with yourself, that was one of the main draws of the job.
With a rueful smile, you press the intercom button to call your personal secretary. “Newt,” you say, “Have the press office call all the networks—I have a big announcement to make. Oh and also, give me a list of all the nearby hospitals with cardiac surgery units. I’ve got an idea for a new con I want to try out.”
THE END