Kjetil Ree / Wikimedia Commons
I don’t know how observant you are, but I’m going to guess not very, based on the fact that so far no one has picked up on the subliminal messages I’ve been inserting into every EIKOOC A EM LIAM one EIKOOC A EM LIAM of my posts EIKOOC A EM LIAM.
senat.gov.pl
Getting into trouble while your parents are out of town is a rite of passage. I know I’ll never forget the time my family accidentally left me home alone at Christmas and I had to defend our house from burglars with a series ingenious booby traps made from everyday household items.
ds.org.rs
You don’t have to say goodbye.
Death is part of the endless cycle of life, and all of us have lost loved ones. All too often, death comes too soon to have one last conversation. But what if there were another way? What if we could speak through the veil of death and tell our loved ones those things we wish we had?
We can.
Among us, there are those with the gift to speak with the spirits, and to hear their voices. Serbian President Boris Tadić is one of those chosen few, and he is willing to share his gift with you.
Antonio Cruz / Agência Brasil
Xanana Gusmão looks like the kind of guy you could have a jam session with. After that, he’d probably read you some poetry, and then give you a massage. And then the massage would turn into… something else.
Actually, Xanana doesn’t just look like that kind of guy, he is that guy! I know, because that’s how he became leader of a country that previously didn’t exist.
Remy Steinegger / World Economic Forum
Looking for: Very, very serious and intense relationship. Must like to cuddle.
Name: Stephen Harper
Age: 50
Location: Ottawa, Canada
Occupation: Prime Minister of Canada
Ever married? No…I’ve just never met the right girl!
Michał Koziczyński / Senat Rzeczypospolitej Polskiej
Throughout the day, he sleeps. Lovers walk hand-in-hand along the avenues, children eat ice cream that melts and drips on the sun-dappled sidewalks, and all the while he rests, inert, as though stone. But as the light fades and sidewalk cafes fill with evening diners, eating hot crusty bread washed down with sangria measured in milliliters, Portuguese President Aníbal Cavaco Silva awakens. His eyes open with an almost audible click and he rises at the waist like a sprung trap, instantly alert, thirsty for blood and ready for the duties of state.
kremlin.ru
Recently I had the imaginary privilege of interviewing Alexander Lukashenko, president of Belarus. The imaginary transcript is below.
Kate: Mr. President, it is an honor to meet you and your mustache.
Lukashenko: Yes.
Kate: Um…may I call you Alex?
Alex: No.
U.S. State Department
The DRC is very hot right now. Well, actually it is not as hot as it normally is, since I’m writing this in July and it’s “winter” there. But it is normally very hot! It is also a “hot-bed” of violent insurrection (also a year-round, every-year occurrence)! And, of course, it has one of the hottest world leaders in Joseph Kabila. Are these things related? Probably.
At first glance, Kabila stands out among his African peers, because he doesn’t have scars on his face. Most African leaders have scars, because they macheted their way to power in the bush. Kabila, however, was born into power as a result of the violent and bloodthirsty work of his father. Sadly, Kabila’s father (also named Kabila, interestingly enough) died shortly after seizing power, due to complications associated with multiple machete wounds to the face. 🙁 But that leaves his son Joseph to rise to the top(ish) of our charts!
